Thursday, May 31, 2012

Still Thinking

Good questions, no?

So my ten year high school reunion is coming up this summer - insert "holy crap, when did that happen?!" sentiments here.  I'm going; I'm looking forward to it.  But I'm also kind of nervous.

I've mentioned once or twice before that my high school years were not exactly straight out of a teen sitcom, a la Saved by the Bell or something.  I think it;s safe to say that my first few years out were all about discovering how much of the subtext I hadn't seen while it was happening, and the last few years have been about realizing how much of it I chose not to see because it was unpleasant.  In spite of all that, my memories are still mostly fond ones, and I'm excited to see people and catch up with what's been going on.

On the other hand . . . chalk it up to one of the disadvantages of facebook, but I'm already aware of how much people have changed - and how much they haven't.  While I look forward to seeing the majority of people with no reservations, I have a hard time believing the feeling is mutual in some situations.  And so I can't help but wonder - will I come away having had a great time catching up with people I haven't seen in a decade?  Or feeling like the odd one out again, the one who doesn't quite fit in even though I always wanted to?  I was never a square peg trying to get into a round hole . . . more like a just-elliptical-enough peg that there was no getting into the round hole no matter what.  How much are we going to slip in to our old personae, and how much have we moved past that?

There's no way to know until we all get there.  One-on-one facebook interactions can't replicate the whole group together in person.

And it's just so weird to think that the fifth graders I said goodbye to today are closer to their high school graduation than I am to mine - seven years versus ten.   Oy!

P. ost  S. cript
In a song mood today - one that totally fits anyone at graduation, and one that always seemed to pop up at important points in my life when I was in school.  It pretty much sums up my educational experience from sixth to twelfth grade.

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