Royally Random

For the record, I still think it rocks.


~ So the book I'm currently reading is an inter-library loan.  From the Library of Congress.  I'm a little mind boggled.  I'll admit I don't know much about the LoC (and I'm too lazy at the moment to google its wikipedia page) but as I understood it, it was a library of important historical documents and stuff.  Things full of clues for cheesy Nicholas Cage characters.  Things used for research . . . not pleasure reading.  Now I'm picturing people wandering around like I do at the local library and picking out a stack of books and finally heading up to the desk to check them out and pulling out their LoC library card.  And I kind of want to do it.

~ I also kind of want to edit their wikipedia page to say that there is a secret family of green cats living in the walls. *wink*Katie*wink*

~ From the Securing-my-Place-in-the-Deepest-Circle-of-Hades File: something about the sacrament hymn we sang today reminds me of Bach's Toccata & Fugue.  Every time I hear it.  I don't think they're in the same key, but maybe close ones?  Anyway, when there's time for the instrumental playings because the priesthood passer dudes aren't ready yet (which usually happens, it's a shorter song) I totally feel like the scene is being set for some creepy happenings at an old abandoned castle in Eastern Europe.  I shan't name the hymn so as not to spoil it for anyone else but . . . yeah.  There it is.

~ Have you ever wondered what the world would be like today if Hitler had been accepted to that art school in Austria or wherever?

I get kind of bored sometimes when Luke's at work.

~ If (SPOILER ALERT) Pinocchio/August and Emma don't end up together by the end of the series, this show will totally be ruined for me.  As of about 30 minutes ago.

Also - if you aren't watching Once Upon a Time, how are we friends? :-)

~ So I relearned how to calculate the are of a triangle this week.  I had to relearn it because I sort of remembered, but I haven't used it since, like, 9th grade.  Sometimes it's kind of hard to resist telling the kids that they've learned everything they need to know about math as of third grade (as evidenced by the fact that I didn't have to relearn anything for third grade math, but I have for fourth and fifth).  Because seriously, when was the last time you used the quadratic equation?  The pythagorean theorem?  Who even remembers those formulas?  Or what they're used for? Believe I don't, I just remember their names.  Because they seriously made my life a living hell in high school and college.

Don't get me wrong, I see a little bit of a point to a basic instruction in algebra.  The idea of manipulating numbers according to what information you have in order to find what you need - that is useful.  As evidenced by the fact that on their homework nearly all of them missed 8 = y / 4 . . . but as soon as I switched it around to y / 4 = 8 they totally got it.  So the idea of taking a number out of anywhere and knowing about how to fill it in - good.  Memorizing a bunch of complicated formulas that can only be used for one specific thing that you're NEVER going to actually need to find in real life - the dumbest thing I've ever heard of.  Seriously, how often do you need to find the circumference of a right trapezoid?  Or the hypotenuse of a cubic sphere?

And yes, I know those are all totally screwy.  I'm just throwing out every piece of math vocab I remember.  I'm willing to bet it's as meaningless to most of you as it is to me. (Dad, you totally don't count.)  Anyway . . . coming off the soapbox . . .

~ From the Should-Have-Seen-it-Coming File: telling a couple of kids Luke's name when they asked and they immediately ask "is his last name Skywalker?"  And then mentioning that's how he got the name Luke.  And no more work was gotten out of those two that day.  (and yes, Katie, it was Eric and Mr. "Awk-werd!")

~ Our chain smoking downstairs neighbors are moving.  We'll be celebrating by opening out front windows for the first time ever pretty much the second the leave.  I am so excited.  Hopefully it'll be a little cooler this summer.

~ Birthday month starting Tuesday!!!  And I have an awesome husband who rolls his eyes and rolls with it.  Not that I, like, try to insist on a Mediterranean cruise or a trip to India or anything.  But we are soooooooooooooo going to Arctic Circle sometime this month.

I dream big. :-)


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I might have posted this before.  But it's pretty much the musical equivalent of tilt shift, so that's okay.

I'm Kind of Brilliant

Haters gonna hate, but dangit, I had fun today! And now, my genius idea - dun-da-da-DAH!!


Presenting CATherine, Duchess of Cambridge. :-) Like I said, I'm kind of a genius.

My best kitty cat pose. And a really crooked tiara. And about-to-fall-off cat ears. It's been a long day. :-)

Anyway, this was totally not my original plan. I really have been trying to top last year ALL YEAR. I finally decided to go with Elizabeth Bennett and just throw my wedding tiara on top and tell the kids I'm a princess. And it would be totally easy because I have the perfect Regency Era-type dress. In fact, I actually wore it as a Halloween costume a few years ago. Sadly, somehow during an entire night of partying up with peoples I only ended up with one semi-good picture showing it off. Blargh.


But still, I looked pretty awesome, eh?

Interestingly enough, I had two costumes that year (long story) and the other one - how's this for crazy? Hannah Montana.


This was a few months before I bought the wig, and I'm really not sure what takes more time - straightening my hair or pinning it up to be hidden under the wig.

So anyway. I'm planning on going with this fabulously already assembled costume, and just after school starts it occurs to me - I've gained a pound or three since 2007, and I probably should make sure the dress still fits. So I go and try it on and all the areas I'm thinking might be a problem are fine . . . but my shoulders have apparently doubled in size or something because the last, like, two inches of the zipper? Just aren't happening. So at this point I have two thoughts:
1) are you FREAKING kidding me?!?!
2) good thing I tried the dress on now, because dude, how much awkward panic would there have been this morning otherwise?!?!

So I'm frantically trying to come up with something new and all thoughts of costume toppage are pretty much out the window with a flurry of grrrrrrrrrr's, and that leads me to spending an afternoon driving from store to every store in town trying to find/make up something that's cheap but still at least a little bit clever. This would be the point where I discover that Shopko had shoved all their Halloween costume stuff into a corner and put it on clearance. Six weeks before Halloween. I still can't not think what the crap? about that.

Anyway, I finally end up at Hobby Lobby, more or less in desperation, but it all worked out because that's where I found the cat ears and tail, and for only, like, ten bucks or something like that. Score! Than I get up to the register and it turns out it's on clearance too or something because it rings up at half the price. Woot!

So then a couple of days later I decide to try the ears on to make sure the headband isn't some super tight headache inducing thing, because that would make for all sorts of torture. Turns out it fits purrrrrfectly (rim shot!) . . . so I just randomly kept the ears on. Because I could. So I'm sitting there stitching furiously and watching . . . something or other on tv . . . and then I remember - I have this!



These teeny tiny tiaras are for sale all over the place at WDW for, like, five bucks or something. I got lucky and found this perfectly intact one at the Cast Member Broken Reject Merchandise Store (that might not be its actual name, lol) for something like fifty cents.

Actually, I got two.


Because I'm awesome like that. :-)

So I run to my jewelry box and quickly discover, as you saw, that the tiara totally works, so I'm totally going with it and feeling all clever and original and now I'm stitching on the couch in cat ears and a tiara because again, I'm awesome like that. And I'm not just going to be a cat, I'm going to be a cat princess! Fun!!

This is the part that's probably obvious . . . but gradually the voice in my head switches things up from "cat princess" to "princess cat" and from there it was just a matter of word association. I mean, duh - princess cat = Princess Cat = Princess CATherine = CATherine, Duchess of Cambridge. Maybe I got there a bit faster than other people would have, but I imagine most people would have gotten there eventually.

Okay, maybe just to Princess CATherine. But that's close enough.

(Now, let's all take a moment and appreciate the fact that this was not my costume. Believe me, I appreciate it!)

So it all works out nicely, since I was planning on buying the earrings and ring anyway, and the only other thing I needed - a pair of black pants - I got at DI. And I lucked into finding a pretty great pair that I might even wear again . . . and that was certainly not in the plan! Woo. Hoo.

So by this point it's, like, the beginning of the month and I'm thinking I'm all set, and then Aunt Sharon emails asking if I have a tiara Sage can borrow, and again - two thoughts.
1) well, yeah, but I'm wearing it . . .
2) wait a second, I have THREE!

So I run to the jewelry box again to make sure my wedding tiara will work with the cat ears. And, obviously, they work together. So I take a moment to kick myself again for letting my mom talk me out of the tiara I really wanted -


Because this baby? Holy awesome. Also, the model? Totally being a really good sport. This picture was taken less than an hour after I made him pose for this one -


He must really love me, eh? :-)

Anyway, I kick myself and then I email back that Sage can have her pick and I'll wear the other one. Because Cinderella always gets top choice. :-)

So there is the long story of how I assembled my costume. As for showing it off today - yeah, no one's thought process went beyond cat princess. But hey, it even took me a few days, so I was not exactly expecting everyone to get it and spend the day telling me how immensely clever I am. It was all good.

They were short on volunteers first thing in the morning, so I started out hiding behind a bench in the spook alley jumping out and screaming and scaring the 5th graders, which was pretty awesome, but after just that grade - about half a dozen groups - my voice was already on its way out. (Let me just say right now I really don't know how certain people spent the entire day wailing last year!) So I switched out as more people showed up and went back to chief hand holder and laugher-at-tough-boys-near-hysterics . . . because oh yes, there were a few. It was great.

So now my feet are ridiculously tired again - good thing the boots I wore have half the heel of last year's boots! - and I'm all curled up because I hardly sat down all day. But it was a fabulous day, and I'm still in costume and hoping we have enough candy for all the little goblins who come by tonight. Since I'd rather not give out money. We don't keep much cash and we're even low on checks, lol. (ten points if you get the reference!)


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From the "SO going to get stuck in your head" file. Also from the "recruiting people to help wring Ashli's scrawny little neck for getting it in my head" file.

17

Day 17 ~ Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why.


Ummm, duh, the Duchess of Cambridge! And that's all I'm going to say about that because either you know the rest already or you are really new around here.

Alternately - Amy Adams. Except I'd be the still Mormon version of Amy Adams. (seriously - her family lives in Idaho! How's that for random?) Because I'm pretty convinced that she actually is Giselle incarnate. Seriously . . . every time I see her, whether acting or as herself that is EXACTLY how she is. Remember this trailer? Ten bucks says she's not actually acting. Because she doesn't have to. Because she's awesome like that.

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Speaking of the Muppets, the "real" trailer is finally out. Count down until November begins . . . NOW! :-)

Because I Can

Yep, I'm doing it. Live, stream-of-consciousness blogging as I watch the royal wedding, preserving my every thought for posterity. Mock me if you like, but I'm having fun. (All times are local . . . work is going to be interesting today!)

3:01: Crap, I should have gotten up earlier. They've already started!

3:03: And they just confirmed that there will be no awesome wedding entrance dance. No surprise . . . but still . . . :-(

3:07: Is it really appropriate for the crowds to be cheering for the Beckhams' arrival? And the timing right after random British dude hired by the Today Show talks about how this is going to be a very dignified affair with no awesome entrance dance. Nice timing.

3:11: The prince appears to be leaving a whole minute late! The horror!! The horror!!

3:12: What exactly is the difference between a supporter and a best man? They're making such a big deal of it, but I can't discern anything beyond the titles.

3:13: *sigh* Those boys are soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo cute!!!!!!!!

3:17: "Of course Kate, or Catherine as I should call her will be the last to arrive at the abbey . . . " Good thing this is a prompt and punctual British wedding. If it was a Mormon wedding odds are that I'd miss the whole thing because she'd have to keep waiting and waiting while the late people trickled in. Plus I'd probably be at work for the whole thing. The whole buncha time zones away thing does have its perks, I guess.

3:19: Cool shot of the church bells!

3:22: Apparently the service will begin with an "introit" . . . however that is spelled. What is an introit?

3:25: I wish we wore hats as much as the British upper crust wore hats. Those girls know how to rock an awesome hat. Trivia: those funky hats that aren't actually hats because they're so small and perched at such a crazy impossible angle that they clearly have to be pinned on? They're called fascinators. Learned that from all the Kate coverage. I like fascinators. :-)

3:34: The only reason I know who the Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie are is because there is a question in the Battle of the Sexes board game my mom bought years ago to be played at parties I had (only happened once) that asks the names of the Duchess of York's daughters. My fascination with all things royal has kind of stuck to the yummy boys in close proximity to the throne, lol. Also, they are very pretty girls but they are neither of them any Diana. Or Kate. Zara Phillips, on the other hand? Holy freaking gorgeous.

Can you tell I've discovered the existence of a lot more of the royal family in the last six months? Confession: Yes, I've been a sucker for pretty much every news story having to do with this wedding. I spent, like, an hour last night clicking from article to article about it. I would never, however get my teeth tattooed.

3:41: Speaking of the York princesses . . . holy fascinators girls! Awe. Some.

3:46: And we are T-minus five minutes until Kate arrives . . . can't wait to see the dress!!!

3:48: So apparently some of the ubber-hoity-toity British ladies are having a conniption over the rumor that Kate might be wearing her hair down. Dumbest freak out ever.

3:49: Okay, those church bells are totally making me picture the wedding scene from Robin Hood. The Disney version. You know, the one with animals . . .

3:52: Oooooooo, Kate's getting in the car . . . must be a big deal, the commentators went silent to watch. The top looks very Grace Kelly. I like. And the hair is DOWN . . . dun dun DUN!!! As a fellow down-haired bride I say you go girl.

3:56: Is it just me, or do the bridesmaids look like they're dressed almost identically to Diana's?

3:58: She's waving!! She's relaxed!! It's incredible!! Seriously? Shut up, commentators.

4:00: She arrives right on time . . . so not a Mormon wedding. And the dress = FABULOUSLY, AMAZINGLY, GORGEOUS. Pippa's dress is very lovely too.

4:03: That train is a touch shorter than Diana's 25-footer. But just a tad, lol.

4:04: Dang, I wish I'd gotten an entrance fanfare like this. How fun would that have been? :-)

4:09: Six minutes? Holy longest aisle walk ever!

4:10: Hey, I know this song! MoTab sings it all the time! Wait . . . these are slightly different words . . . weird. (It's "Guide Us Oh Thou Great Jehovah" . . . sort of . . . )

4:12: Hello Elton John.

4:13: Hello Posh Spice. And husband.

4:14: Luke's quoting Princess Bride. Day = made. (Yes, Luke joined me a few minutes ago . . . because he's awesome like that.)

4:15: What would happen if someone did speak up when the clergydude said "speak now . . . "? Especially at this wedding?!

4:16: Does the whole congregation have to stand the whole time? Oy! Also - how funny would it have been if William had gotten his own names mixed up?

4:16: Yay!! Kate got the names right!! Apparently there are those who say that Diana technically married Charles' father because of the way she flubbed up his names . . .

4:18: *sigh* even his voice is hot . . .

4:20: With every different angle I am liking her dress more and more . . .

4:21: Okay, I'll admit I know nothing about any wedding ceremony different from my own, but seriously - they just walked away from the altar to some chairs on the side . . . why? What the what? Aren't they supposed to stay where everyone can see them? So confused . . .

4:22: Hello again, Princess Beatrice. And Princess Beatrice's crazy awesome funky fascinator.

4:23: We've seen Elton John multiple times now. Luke's asking for Mr. Bean. And theorizing that we'll see him climbing a tree to save a cat.

4:24: Who is that and why is he speechifying? . . . . . okay, not speechifying apparently . . . more like sermonizing . . . which means he must be one of the three priestly guys co-conducting . . .

4:25: Wait! Turns out it's Kate's brother James. So my original question stands. Why?

4:32: And now, after the speechifying we have sermonizing. Is the wedding part over? What's going on now? So . . . confused . . .

4:37: Is it just me, or does William look a little bored?

4:38: Is Kate not allowed to let her back touch the back of the chair anymore Jane Austen style? I hope for her sake she's just trying to be uber-proper. Especially considering how comfortably William is sitting.

4:39: Song #4. Is all this because it's a royal wedding, or is this typical of any church wedding for the Church of England?

4:42: They're back! So . . . the wedding part wasn't done . . . I think?

4:43: Someone in that choir is hitting an awesomely low note.

4:44: There are full grown trees along the aisle. And well above them there are massive chandeliers. Westminster Abbey has been bumped up several notches on my Places I Gotta See List. And it was already pretty high.

4:45: Wait, they're just praying. Why couldn't they pray from their chairs? Everybody else is . . . I don't get non-Mormon weddings . . .

4:47: Holy crap, they've got a full symphonic orchestra in there!! Where have they been hiding?!

4:49: Hello commoners stuck watching outside. I mean . . . er . . . cheerio! God save the Queen and all that! :-)

4:51: I'm cracking up over the conversation we just had . . .

Luke: So . . . she's going to be queen?
Me: Ummm . . . not for a while.
Luke: What's the queen's name?
Me: Ummmmm . . . Elizabeth . . .
Luke: So when she croaks . . .
Me: Charles will be king.
Luke: Wait, so this dude's not next in line?

Maybe it's not as funny if you not a royal junkie, but I'm rather amused. Fear not, Luke just recieved a brief lesson in who's who and who's where in line for the throne.

4:54: I think it's over . . . they're leaving anyway. And the commentators are talking again - lame. Yeah, I only followed what was going on for, like, the first 15 minutes.

4:57: And the instant replays begin. To bad there are no cameras where they're signing the license or whatever. Then the commentators would stay shut up.

4:58: Matt Lauer, you are a good looking guy, but no one cares about what made you emotional during the ceremony. And that joke was not funny.

5:00: Oooooooooooo there's the carriage!!!!

5:01: Hello again Princess Beatrice's fascinator. That is seriously the WEIRDEST one I've ever seen. I can't get enough of it.

5:03: They just showed the schedule of events. They're not going to get to the balcony for another hour?! Blargh.

5:04: We so should have had a fanfare when we came out of the temple. Would have ROCKED.

5:05: OMG!!! OMG!! The new princess curtsied to the queen!! And smiled!! Whenever I think I'm getting too obsessive I'm reminded that there are people obsessed to a really ridiculous degree. Also: shut up commentators.

5:07: Finally a satisfying shot of the tiara!! And I wholeheartedly approve of it.

5:08: Wait, wasn't she supposed to leave her bouquet on the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier as she walked by? I guess they'll go back later . . .

5:09: More Robin Hood bells. They should totally run to the carriage like in the movie. :-)

5:10: I didn't time this one, but this aisle walk might have been even longer than the first one . . .

5:11: Wishing we'd done the Temple Square carriage ride right about now . . .

5:13: If it's only going to take a few minutes to get to Buckingham Palace, why is it going to take an hour to get to the balcony? Seriously, no one cares about the rest of the family today. Grrr.

5:16: Apparently six weeks after the honeymoon the royal couple is going to Canada. Cue Lacey booking tickets to Canada. :-P

5:20: I read yesterday that for the second reception - the party - they're hanging disco balls in the throne room. There are no words for how much I would love to see that. Here's hoping for leaked pictures tomorrow!

5:22: The commentators mentioned Princess Catherine. Luke said "Who's Princess Catherine?"

Say it with me kids - Face. Palm. :-)

5:24: A few minutes to get to the palace? BIG FAT LIE! It took over ten. Stupid commentators. Shut up.

5:26: Speaking of official photographs, I really want to copy of Kate's white engagement picture dress. The blue dress was gorgeous and I love it, but the white one is the one I sort of covet. Also, while Luke did not give me a replica of the engagement ring for our anniversary, my birthday is coming up soon . . . lol.

5:31: Okay, it's decided. I do not like Camilla's hat. And that dislike is not connected to the fact that I do not like her.

5:32: More bells!! Yay!! I am loving all the bell music.

5:35: Members of the royal family are supposed to curtsy lower than commoners? A very low "court curtsy"? Does this strike anyone else as backwards?

5:36: Natalie Morrales - 1) I like your hat. 2) Shut up.

5:37: The jumbotrons in the streets of London are showing commercials. I don't know why, but I find this awesome.

5:38: "It's important to remember that these are not toy soldiers." Really? I was wondering . . . it's so hard to tell, you know. Shut UP commentators!!!!!

5:40: Okay, NBC. I realize that you can show nothing I am interested in until they get to the balcony. But I'm still mad that you're showing commercials again.

5:47: Guards in funny fuzzy tall black hats. Giggle. :-)

6:04: Still waiting . . . what's taking so long? Grrrrrr. Also: the commentators are right - if this was happening in the US no way no how would the crowd be so calm and courteous moving toward the palace. The number of times I nearly got trampled from people determined to be the first in line for a freaking stunt show (not to get in - to get in line!) . . . because if you're not there three hours in advance you'll never get in, never mind the fact that the people who work there told you to come back 45 minutes early . . . GAH!!!! But I digress. Anyway - why can't Americans be as polite as Brits?

6:09: "This . . . was . . . quite orderly, I think some of the Americans are coming in now . . . " accompanied by shots of people pushing and shoving. ROTFL!! Okay, you are one commentator who can keep talking. I feel so vindicated. Justified. Satisfied. :-)

6:15: Oooooooooo . . . someone's peeking out the window!!! Such suspense!!!! Wait a second . . . people are taking bets on exactly how many seconds this kiss is going to last? It's official - my healthy fascination has not crossed into obsession.

6:17: PIRATES TRAILER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOO HOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! First time seeing it . . . when did it get released and how did I miss it? Also, I think I already have a favorite line - "What were you doing in the convent anyway?" "I thought it was a brothel. Easy mistake." I've been waffling about seeing this movie, because really, the horse is really starting to be rather well beaten. But I might have to now.

6:20: "How did the royal kiss become a tradition?" Who cares, it is and that's all that matters right now. Shut up commentators.

6:21: Someone could totally make a drinking game based on me saying "shut up commentators," couldn't they? :-)

6:22: Oh look, the sun's coming up!

6:25: Here they are!! Yay!!! Hooray for British promptness!!! I think her dress got prettier in the last hour.

6:27: Well. That was short. Lots of people just lost of lot of money.

6:27: Slow-mo replay? Really? Sure, it was short, but that's a bit much, don't you think?

6:29: Falling more and more in love with her earrings too.

6:29: Take 2 = much better.

6:30: My regular alarm just went off. Crap. Guess I better get in the shower and get the day started now.

6:30: Why couldn't we have a military flyover? Oh yeah . . . not actually royalty. :-) Also - Kate looks a little dazed. Quite understandable.

6:32: People actually climbed into the fountain? Seriously? Insane. Ridiculous. Bet they're American.

6:33: *sigh* Gotta sign off. That was a GORGEOUS dress.


That was fun. But this is going to be a long day. :-)

I Was Still (sort of) Hoping

They are, too.


So I'm not really one to blog in response to big news stories . . . as you may have noticed. But I kind of couldn't resist this week.

As you may have also noticed via my facebook status, I'm a little brokenhearted over this whole Prince William getting officially engaged thing. Which, yes, is kind of silly for a lot of reasons. Among them being the fact that he's been unofficially engaged for, what, ten years now? Dude, does anyone else see a ridiculous sitcom premise in that sentence? Seriously.

Anyway. Back in the day when I was just discovering that Holy Crap! Boys Are Cute! just happened to correspond with the time that Prince William was making the cover of Tiger Beat, like, every day. And when it came to cute boys . . . holy crap, that boy was cute!!! In fact, I think he was probably my first celebrity crush. And since my daydreams have always tended to be ridiculously over the top - well, I had some highly enjoyable silly little fantasies. We would meet skiing in the Alps (where my family suddenly acquired the money for me to go skiing in the Alps solo was always rather vague) and ultimately that lead to Prince William abdicating his throne to marry me. Which is kind of interesting, because I'm tolerably certain I didn't know the word "abdicate" at the time, although I was clearly familiar with the concept. Weird. And then I would spend much more time than would be healthy to admit envisioning the wedding, which would still be elaborately over the top even though His Royal Highness was marrying some random lowly American commoner.

Confession: it's probably pretty obvious, but I've always had this crazy obsession with princesses. And brides. I'm a sucker for any story about either . . . and yes, The Princess Bride ranks very highly on my list of best movies of all time. This whole "internet" thing? Has been pretty awesome because I'm always discovering stories about celebrity weddings or wedding planning - which, yes, I still read. I've been reading them since long before I thought I was going to be getting married shortly after high school, so why on earth should I stop now? Part of it is the look - the gorgeous dresses, the tiaras, the fact that it's pretty much impossible to not be pretty if you're either princess or bride. That part probably comes from hearing that I wasn't pretty a lot when I was growing up. Also - if I see a friend-of-a-friend on facebook with a wedding/bridal picture as their profile picture, I have to look at their profile in the hopes that they don't have privacy settings as strict as mine and I can look at their wedding pictures. Yep, wedding pictures of people I don't know. Because I love looking at any wedding pictures. Long story short, this summer was quite the jackpot.

But I also love the idea of being a princess. When I was younger all that meant was wearing the pretty dresses and having charming princes rescue you, but as I've gotten older I become more fascinated the more I learn about real princesses. I think that's one of the reasons I love historical European fiction - sure, these women are princesses and duchesses and whatever, but they're being used as political pawns . . . and then there are the ones who are strong enough to take control of their own destinies. I know, it sounds sooooooooo corny - but I love it. I'm an absolute sucker for it. Pulls me in every time. I've wanted to be a princess ever since forever. I'm pretty sure a big part of the reason I've always been in love with Han Solo (other than the fact that Harrison Ford is HOT!) is because I've wanted to be Leia ever since the first time I saw Star Wars when I was six. Naturally I auditioned to be a princess (well, the audition was for the sadly more generic "character performer," but Aurora was my ultimate dream/goal) while I was at Disney, but dead height does not get any deader than me. Let me tell you, that was depressing. (on the other hand, if I had gotten in, I wouldn't have met Luke . . . and we can all see where that thought is going . . . )

Part of my . . . wake-up call, I guess . . . to the reality of real-world princesses actually came about the same time I was falling in love with Prince William. It was 1997 (go ahead, search your memories . . . or wikipedia, lol) and I was just starting to actually pay attention to the news, even though I didn't understand most of what they were talking about. It seemed like Princess Diana was always in the news, first for all the charity work she was doing, and then of course . . . such a horrible car crash. It was really jarring for me - I'd sort of started looking to her as a role model, and then she was suddenly gone, and at the time I'd never been to a funeral or anything, so that was pretty much the most personal experience I'd had with death to that point. Crazily enough (timing wise) there was a back-to-school sleepover already planned as a YW activity that just happened to be on the right night. I was one of the very few who stayed up all night to watch her funeral. Which made an interesting contrast to my mom talking about watching her wedding all those years before. If I remember correctly she didn't watch it herself, but she was working at the United Way at the time, and the chapter in Puyallup was sponsored by the local Catholic church (or however that works) and all the nuns watched and talked about it for ages before and after. And I can't say I blame them . . . I mean, holy amazingly gorgeous dress, Batman!! Not to mention that she really was one of the most beautiful women ever. Yeah, suffice it to say my princess obsession was only increased that year.

I wouldn't say I've followed Prince William's life closely since then . . . but like I said, any story with "prince" or "princess" in the headline is definitely going to be clicked on. How's this for crazy - I even stumbled across a slide show of several princess' engagements rings . . . last week! And can I just say - Diana's/Kate's is BEAUTIFUL!!!!! I would love a replica . . . a totally fake replica, of course. I don't imagine that a diamond-surrounded EIGHTEEN FREAKING CARAT sapphire will be in our price range any time soon. And by any time soon I mean . . . ever. On the other hand, I can't imagine wearing something so massive. My ring is only a quarter of a carat, and it still amazes me sometimes how big it is! Not to mention all the times I've scraped Luke with it . . . completely unintentionally of course . . . but I swear one of these days it's going to draw blood.

I would be so intimidated to wear the real one if I were Kate Middleton though. Heck, I'm too intimidated to wear Luke's grandmother's ring. I'm honestly still overwhelmed by the fact that it's sitting in my jewelry box right now. It turned out Luke's dad had been saving it for Luke's fiancee for forever, so the day after we told his parents we were engaged he pulled it out and over-nighted it to Florida. Yeah, there are no words to say how glad I am that I didn't know about that until it was already there! But it was so unfathomable to me - giving a precious family heirloom to someone they'd never met. (Oh yeah, did I mention we'd been engaged for a month before we met each other's parents?) I couldn't help but be certain that as soon as they met me Luke's dad would want the ring back - not because his parents aren't awesome, because they are the greatest. Just because I have that much of an inferiority complex. But it's an absolutely lovely ring. I wear it sometimes, but we decided we're going to give it to our oldest daughter (assuming we have one, of course). I feel like she deserves it more than I do. Being, you know, actually related to its original owner and all.

So . . . yeah. I'm totally going to watch the royal wedding next year. And I'm totally glad that it'll probably be during the summer so there won't be any major repercussions from getting up super early . . . or, more likely, staying up all night to watch. However, for those of you who are now convinced that I'm absolutely nuts - never fear. I shall not be watching dressed like Marguerite from Ever After ( a picture of which I cannot find for the life of me . . . but obviously I'm referring to the wedding scene where she's wearing so much mourning-type clothing one would think she'd just been widowed). And I definitely will not be buying the commemorative plate.

P. ost S. cript
If anyone could swerve my allegiance from Prince William, it would definitely be . . . PERRY THE PLATYPUS!!!!! Who's theme song I totally have as a ringtone. (Ashli . . . you should call me more often. It's your ringtone.)